Tuesday, July 20, 2010
I recall that I used to have this problem of reacting or responding to others. I thought I got rid of this problem ages ago, however I realized that I was wrong. I’m not sure if you realized this, but we tend to put on different masks in front of others. Perhaps because we feel “safe” to let the other party know a particular side of us. Well to some people, I appear more of a joke. Perhaps this is because of my easy-going nature and my cool-temperament. However even though I joke a lot, this doesn’t mean I don’t like to be taken seriously. How many people have actually seen me exploding? I bet almost none of my friends have seen me in a frenzied state.
I hurt someone really important to me lately. Perhaps this person is the only few people that have seen my frenzied state. Trust me it’s an extremely ugly sight, when I get angry you will see a totally different side of me I will be irrational, extremely aggressive and provocative. Well the point is that this hot-headed me will start spouting nonsense that can be very hurtful at times. Here’s the scenario, remember I have a post that mentions about fixing shattered glass? Well truth is that these pieces of glass can no longer be pieced back to what it originally was. I tried; I really tried my best perhaps it is god’s plan to allow certain events to take place. I recognize that these glass fragments can no longer be pieced back to what it originally was however I am still trying my very best to piece together the smaller fragments to retain what can still be saved and by doing so, I tend to get myself “cut” and hurt. Thus giving rise to my frenzied state.
This is the problem with me, I get extremely angry and I start talking shit and then like a couple of hours later, I hit myself real hard on my forehead and I go … “What the hell was I thinking”.
Here’s a quote relating to what I mentioned above, hope that anyone who’s reading this will consider the consequences about confrontation when in a “frenzied” state. “Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.” ~Ambrose Bierce
(There’s this saying that when you dream about someone, it’s probably because that person is thinking of you. I wonder if this is true)
the origin.1:30 PM
Name: Perry Tan Z.Y
Birthday: 22nd December 1988
Religion: Christian
Personality: INFJ
Loves: Basketball, Anime, HK, Korean and Chinese Dramas, Hanging out with friends, Watching Movies, "You Know ...", Gaming and Chinese Music
Hates these Traits ... Arrogance, Injustice, Insensitivity and Running Away (Even though I tend to run away a lot)
Wishlists: Enlightenment, Thought-Antagonist, Time Travel Machine, The other Puzzle Piece and A book called "How to become a Better Man"
