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Thursday, November 19, 2009
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
Sometimes I really wonder if anyone in this particular organization is in a similar state as I am. I believe I’m some of the very few who hop around so often, if this continues I’m very sure you can call me the “Jumper”.
Looks like my previous posts which harp on my rite of passage to seek redemption will be my very last. Life is pretty paradoxical I guess. At a point of time, I desperately want to run away from my fears, but now when I’m ready to face them and destroy them for good they just disappear.
You know, in life some of us reach a state of pseudo-enlightenment. Meaning, we get enlightened for a period of time but when a similar situation hits you, you just stumble and fall into dire straits. I had a terrible night yesterday. I couldn’t sleep because this new arrangement that god has for me has thrown me into confusion again.
I really wonder why life throws us into such madness. Imagine yourself pulling you hair, laughing and crying at the same time. That’s how I felt and I guess it won’t be the last. Well I guess life is like an automated tennis ball launcher, except it tosses obstacles. Life often throws us into a state of pain, it could manifest itself in many forms for instance things that irritates you and makes you angry. Imagine this, if your surfing, would u ride with the tide or would u ride against the tide? Well the answer is pretty obvious, we really got to take a breather and smile at anything that life that life throws at us. You got to trust god …
“Child of My love, fear not the unknown morrow,
Dread not the new demand life make of thee;
Thy ignorance doth hold no cause for sorrow
Since what thou knowest not is known to me” – Exley
This is a passage I like a lot, it is written on the 21st October issue of the daily bread.
“But all is shifting and changing these days; I’m being led out, away from familiar surroundings and into a vast unknown. What new limits will overtake me in the coming days? What nameless fears will awaken?
We may well be dismayed at what life has for us this year and next, but our Shepherd knows the way we’re taking. And he goes before. He will not lead us down paths too dangerous or too arduous where he cannot help us. He knows our limits. He knows the way to green pasture and good water; all will have to do is follow.”
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Recently, we had a magazine talk and I’m really a sucker for it, but not this time. These magazines always cause me to feel very insignificant. There’s like so much out there in the world that I don’t know about, so much that I desperately want to find out.
The colossal misunderstanding people have of me is that I’m a studious guy who reads a lot. Unfortunately sorry to disappoint you but I’m exactly like cloud from final fantasy 7. Unlike Zack I’m no hero but I’m trying so hard to be one. I’m always pushing myself to read more because there’s so much that I don’t know.
My new job, what can I say? Some people envy it, some people love it and some others hate it. Well, I guess when you are forced into a situation similar to ours, you would probably understand that no matter what you do, it’s still shit and like all others kinds of shit they all stink. Except this stink bomb is really potent, a minute passes like how an hour passes, and an hour seems to take days, and just 1 day takes forever.
To forgo a life which many subjugate themselves too, I have decided to make good use of my time to find out about so many things that I don’t know about, for instance history of many countries, how stocks work and perhaps catch a few copies of fortune magazine.
Ever since I hurt my ankle, I haven’t been playing basketball. It’s been nearly a month and the half and I’m still not fully recovered. My soul hungers for the game. Whenever the thought of not playing for the week kicks in, I get really angry with myself.
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I once thought that as long as I followed the principle of “to not unto others what you don’t want others to do upon you” it would be fine. However, I’ve come to realize that perhaps I haven’t been sensitive enough, sometimes what might seems ok for us might not be ok to others.
Tenderheart, rings a bell? It’s the care bear with the love on it’s tummy… actually we humans are all tenderhearts, it’s just that we live in a very cold world. The things that society do, the small uncaring and selfish ways cause our hearts to harden. I’m not trying to be a saint because I’ll admit that I am influenced greatly by the world too, so much that I fear myself.
Maybe that’s why we go to church to let god mould our hearts. This is gonna sound random but I’m currently reading “The Lost Symbol” and there’s this part that make me wonder if I’m just a delusional fool. There’s this part that talks about noetic science and how human thoughts can actually alter reality in a form of altering matter itself. I wonder if prayer works the same way, afterall it is said “For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.”
I always believed that praying was about being sincere and telling god about it.
[ Stay Happy =D ]
the origin.8:46 PM
Name: Perry Tan Z.Y
Birthday: 22nd December 1988
Religion: Christian
Personality: INFJ
Loves: Basketball, Anime, HK, Korean and Chinese Dramas, Hanging out with friends, Watching Movies, "You Know ...", Gaming and Chinese Music
Hates these Traits ... Arrogance, Injustice, Insensitivity and Running Away (Even though I tend to run away a lot)
Wishlists: Enlightenment, Thought-Antagonist, Time Travel Machine, The other Puzzle Piece and A book called "How to become a Better Man"
my voice
taggie
preferably cbox
entries;
myself;
shouts;
links;
my past;
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