My Confession Box

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Bottled up thoughts. We all have certain forms of them don’t we?
Each day, I would try my best to set aside time for jogging and pull-ups. This were points of times in my life in which I enjoyed the serenity of the vicinity, the rustling of the leaves, the beautiful sunshine and the breeze that calms me.
Unlike my ordinary days, today was one such day at which my quiet time was not working out. As I jogged, I broke away from my slow and steady rhythm and I went faster and faster. The feeling of unjust within me had to be expressed. Today, FYP phase 1 grades were released. I was devastated. I felt that I in no way deserve this grade. This wasn’t because most of my team mates scored better than me. In fact, I was happy for them that they did alright. However I couldn’t say I felt the same for myself.
The worst thing was that there was no forms of explanation given whatsoever. I could only think of the various criteria that they will mark us upon
1. Presentation Skills
2. Log book
3. Online log
4. Attendance
5. FYP report
More or less, these were the major points. I am very unhappy to hear that certain teams have scored very well as compared to some others. If the aim of a project is simple and there really isn’t much to talk about, all that matters would be to present the necessities. Not everyone gets to present the main focus of the day, some people will be left to do the odd jobs each day. I never once blamed anyone for that. During my FYP presentation, I was told to present conclusion based on task allocation. Well, I felt that I did a good job in summing up. However perhaps the examiner felt otherwise. During the actual day as we presented, these “Examiners” can ask us 5 minutes later what is this particular thing, when we just mentioned it during our presentation. It really triggers me to wonder whether they were listening to begin with.
Because I was working on conclusion, I really didn’t had much opportunities answering questions. Everyone was hogging to answer and they definitely had the right to do so since they were presenting on the particular topic. Well what in the seven heavens would an examiner ask about conclusion? Let’s face it nothing.
Log book wise, I think I did a good job. Online log I followed my PI’s instruction to make it short and concise stating the objectives and what was done on the day itself.
Attendance wise, perhaps I was absent like 3 times for no apparent reason. But the other time I was absent continuously for a few days was because of a funeral. If anyone feel’s that what I have stated isn’t a valid reason, come to me and I swear that the day’s sunlight will be the last that you will ever experience.
FYP report, yes I heard that mine was problematic at the beginning and I have been working on it. I still felt that proper guidance wasn’t given.
What kind of stupid grading system does RP have? 50% presentation? 20% online log? There isn’t even proper instructions given. I feel that the whole system is bullshit, so much of ISO’s.

How was our log books graded, by flipping it through 3 minutes? Wow I’m impressed.
Without a doubt, certain projects have a wider scope than others and there is certainly more to talk about. Would it be fair for those who have less to talk about?
If so, shouldn’t another grading system be utilized such as isolating each student of a group and grading him personally on what he has learnt?

As my thoughts trailed on, shards of bad memory started to fall into place. There was this very strong murderous intent that sparked within me. I swear if I had a knife during “THAT POINT OF TIME” I would have killed a few people.
If none of my concerns are addressed in time to come, trust me. You will see a very different me. One who would fight for his rights to the very end and I mean till the very end to the extent of death itself.

the origin.7:07 PM